We spend a great deal of our time worrying about what others think about us. As a teacher I am often thinking, do they like me or I shouldn’t have said that, they won’t like me. How do they see me? Do they think I am as fantastic or as useless as I think I am? Do they see the spot erupting on my face or will they work out I’m a fake.
The reason why people don’t like public speaking, I think, is that the audience will judge you and see you for what you think you are, which mostly is anxious, not confident and possibly not very good-looking.
How we see ourselves both personality and looks, is something that we make up. We have a view of who we think we are but the person next to you will see something entirely different. Therefore our view of ‘self’ is not entirely correct. Also how we view ourselves changes from day-to-day, week to week. Some mornings I wake up and am great, happy, confident, some mornings I wake up and wonder where the ugly hideous creature came from and won’t someone take her away.
The point is this, you are not who you think you are, you are only what you think you are. Abandon the self judgement, people don’t see you as you see you. What you create for yourself is false, imaginary.
Practice for today: Have a wee think about how your view yourself on any given day. If you catch yourself making an assumption about who you are, say to yourself ‘neti neti’ the Indian phrase for ‘not that, not that’. The question is though, if you are not who you think you are , who are you?
Answer: I am light, I am love and I am a bit of all that!
This experiment done by dove examines how we see ourselves and how others see us.