I doubt if I will ever be able to do handstands in the middle of a room. It’s not that I don’t want to, I’d love to be able to. How I would love to frolic around on my hands gayly! It’s not that I’m physically unable either. It’s just that they scare me. The fear is a triple threat, fall over, embarrass myself and break every bone in my body. That’s how I see it playing out.
Everyone is frightened of something. Familial conditioning and experience have taught us fear. Like a child unable to open the closet for fear of the boogie man, lots of us tread through life clinging on to our perceived fears because it’s a whole lot safer than taking the risk. Some people are fearful of flying, death, spiders, changing jobs, leaving their partners, starting a relationship, and the number one… public speaking. The list goes on. Having a bit of fear can be life preserving at a base level, but after that it’s all made up and really doesn’t serve us any purpose in life.
From a logical point of view fear is not always real it is really just a feeling we get. We say to ourselves oh no, it’s handstand/job changing time I can’t do it I’m too frightened. Is the threat real? Because it feels like we are going to be annihilated does it mean we are in actual danger? Will we really die, or embarrass ourselves? What I think we really worry about deep down is we will lose something instead. We will lose our security, our comfort, our pride or whatever it is we are hanging on to that immobilizes us and keeps us ‘safe’. Stepping out of our comfort zone is counter-intuitive, it pushes against the tide of evolution. However stepping up to our fears pushes us in the direction of excellence and away from the sentence ‘I wish I had/could’. Stepping out of fear challenges our habitual patterns.
If you really want to do something but there is a fear of doing it think about these things?
Is the fear real or imagined?
When I have this feeling could I be more aggressive towards that feeling rather than nurturing and stepping deeper into my own fear?
Do I use avoidance/numbing techniques to dumb down my fear? eg. leaving the room during handstand/ over drinking/smoking/eating, watching tv?
Practice for today: Is there something that you really want to do with your life? The best way to face your fears is to take baby steps. Break down the handstand into ten parts and work on each one of those to build up your confidence. Whatever your fear is, take one step closer to your dream instead on one step back.